Robot-Hugs

Where has the comic been all my life!? Why is it only coming to my attention now!? (According to the archives, it’s been around since Dec 2009.)

If you have an identify that comes under the giant umbrellas of “kink/queer/lgbt/poly/mentally ill/whatever,” this is definitely for you.

I came across the Body Policing Police (I can’t even remember where I saw the original link), and it was love at first sight.  Cativian just confirmed what I instantly knew.

Robot Hugs - Enjoy the cold, emotionless embrace of Robot Hugs.

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If you’re reading this anywhere but That Girl, Fae or a feed reader without attribution, it has been STOLEN! Who knew that my stuff was that good? ~ Fae

Creative Commons License
That Girl, Fae by R Simpson-Large aka Fae Teardrop is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 New Zealand License.

Because It Affects All of Us

This is a pretty fantastic post about a cis white guy and his response to an equally pretty awful post which appeared in the UK’s Observer:

Here’s why I take transgender issues personally…

Because I or someone I love might get cancer at some point, and a trans person who is capable of discovering the cure is otherwise occupied defending their right to exist.

I live in a world that needs leadership, and a smart, tireless trans person who should maybe be President is busy arguing that they deserve basic human respect.

I want to drive a fucking flying car someday, and the trans person who might invent it is stuck responding to Guardian editorials that treat them like they’re subhuman.

- Dan Solomon, The Frisky

It shows that there are actually people don’t live solely in their own bubble, not caring about the consequences of what they say/do.  There are people who realise that unless we get our shit together and treating everyone else the way we expect to be treated, the way they deserve to be treated, no matter their race, gender, sexuality, and the way they choose to display their identity.  If we can’t do that, then every single one of us is fucked.  And that makes me despair for humanity a little less, and the future is a little less bleak.

H/T Violet Blue

balloon

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If you’re reading this anywhere but That Girl, Fae or a feed reader without attribution, it has been STOLEN! Who knew that my stuff was that good? ~ Fae

Creative Commons License
That Girl, Fae by R Simpson-Large aka Fae Teardrop is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 New Zealand License.

When Words Aren’t Enough

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TGF Owl v2 Like the Owl said, O.o

H/T Kate or Die

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If you’re reading this anywhere but That Girl, Fae or a feed reader without attribution, it has been STOLEN! Who knew that my stuff was that good? ~ Fae

Creative Commons License
That Girl, Fae by R Simpson-Large aka Fae Teardrop is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 New Zealand License.

Fighting Against the Binary Assumption

I came across this post this morning, and, like this one, it got me thinking, particularly this Q&A:

Is bisexual a legit thing or is it a fence-sitting thing for either confused straight girls or half-closeted lesbians? Whether legit or not, does the concept of bi hurt LGBT political equality since the straight majority may see it as fence-sitting, as evidence that being gay is a choice?

I. Love. This. Question!

Many people see bisexuality as someone who’s “unable to choose,” “confused,” or “just waiting to cross over to fully homosexual.” I could not disagree more! There is this thing, and it’s called desire. As humans, we’ve got it. Sexually, we desire to be with people (for the most part), and those people differ per person. Heterosexual people want to be with a sex opposite of their own, because that’s what turns them on. Homosexuals: same, only same sex. It’s basic, when you think about it. So, for a bisexual person, their desires lie with both sexes. And who’s to say that’s not a real thing?

There are those cases that make it difficult for people who strongly identify as bisexual: the BTG (bi til graduation) folks who use their time in their 20s to hook up with lots of people, be it female or male, or for attention at parties… whatever. Those people happen. It’s called life. Maybe they really were legitimately curious — we aren’t here to pass judgment on those people, but they can make it difficult. If someone’s personal experience is only with girls who made out with other girls around a beer pong table to turn on the guy next to them and later take them home, then yeah, it can be frustrating. Coming out as bisexual is incredibly difficult, and can be hard to explain. My bisexual friends are fantastic at explaining themselves: they are very attracted to both sexes for different reasons. I’ve mentioned this before: I have a friend who finds nothing sexier than both a big strong man and a delicate woman’s touch, and that’s what works for her. Who are we to say that isn’t real?

There’s also some crappy shaming that does come from inside of the LGBT community toward bisexual people. I’ve seen it happen, and it sucks. When someone who’s supposed to be on your side wants you to just choose already, it can be disheartening (hello, Alice on The L Word!) and discouraging. It’s unfair for people to assume that all people should feel what they do on any issue, and sexuality is huge. Just because someone is attracted to both sexes (whether they identify as bisexual, pansexual, genderqueer, or anything in between) doesn’t mean that it’s not true for them. There’s some identity-shaming that goes down, both from the straight community who may want things to be cut and dry, and same for the queer community who doesn’t understand why a choice can’t be made. What most people don’t see is that a choice has been made. Bisexual people are choosing to put themselves out there as a person who loves who they love, just as all other people have. It’s not our place to tell them they’re wrong.

- Alison Wisneski, Ask A Lesbian, Vol. 4

I suppose this is another chapter in my ‘You’re Doing it Wrong’ beef I’ve got going on at the moment.

I identify as pansexual and happen to be in a heterosexual marriage.

Being married to J doesn’t magically make me straight. Just like being in any type of relationship doesn’t mean you’re no longer attracted to anyone else outside that relationship.

It doesn’t mean I’m confused, that I just haven’t decided which ‘team’ I’m playing for yet. There aren’t only two sides. Sexuality is a beautiful. fluid spectrum; you may fall anywhere along that spectrum, and you’re position may change over time.

Being in a heterosexual relationship doesn’t take away my legitimacy as a member of the LGBTQ community, though it certainly feels like it. I’m pretty sure if J happened to be female then it would be more acceptable, then I would only be a ‘confused’ lesbian.

I understand my relationship with J, the fact we are even able to get married, gives both of us privilege. But that privilege is only through assumptions of others (which all privilege is I suppose, to a degree). That privilege takes away my identity, makes me invisible.

Exclusion never really benefits anyone, the excluded nor the excluder.